Thursday, March 22, 2012

Surreal Night and Day

As I drift off people come in and out of the room throughout the night.
I recall more vitals taken and the lab drawing blood.
I sleep on and off. At one point I awake to a little voice coming from the next bed.

I vaguely recall seeing a small form huddled in the first bed as they brought me in.
She says "Oh dear, I am wet and I can't find the button to call the nurse"
I start to get up, then I remember that here I am no longer the caregiver.

I tell her that I will call someone for her and I do. They enter promptly and attend to her and locate her call light which had fallen to the floor.
Once she is settled she thanks me and we both drift off to sleep.

More labs were drawn this morning and Dr. S. is here bright and early.
I have been npo since midnight for the paracentesis I will have later this morning.
But first I will be taken down for a doppler study of my legs.
Dr.S. and Dr. B. have conferred and If all goes well I will be released today and return Monday 3/19/12 for my first round of chemo.
Right now the plan is to have 3 rounds of chemo then re-eval for surgery after which I will have more chemo.

I go for the doppler study. I have numerous blood clots in both of my legs. I will be placed on Fragmin which I will self-administer at home to thin my blood.
The co-pay is horrendous but again my oncology team goes to battle with the insurance co. for me and they are victorious and a reasonable compromise is found.

Dr. S. says I may need some type of filter placed before surgery to prevent a clot from wreaking havoc-I just listen and nod.I am a little shell-shocked by it all and wonder what is next.
I go down and have my 2nd paracentesis. They take 2 liters of fluid off and I return to my room.
It is amazing to me how much better it makes me feel to have the fluid drained.
The nurse checks my vitals and I have something to eat.
Dave has been here for a while now and I prepare to dress and go home.

There is a problem though. My b/p dipped down a little after the paracentesis and my heart rate has gone up.
I am given an ekg and blood is drawn. They want to keep me overnight to check my cardiac enzymes-they think I may be having a small MI. My heart rate remains high.

Dave looks worried-I tell him not to-no way am I having a heart attack.
I agree to stay.Dave sits with me until evening and then he goes home.

More labs are drawn in the morning. My little roommate has been transferred and there is someone new in her place.I try to be quiet as I go to the bathroom to wash up.
The doctors come by and check on me. Everything looks good. My labs are negative and I will get to go home. Dave arrives and I demonstrate to my nurse that I am capable of giving myself the fragmin injection.
My Chemo team drops by and tell me they will see me Monday.
I get my walking papers and home I go. Yay!

Love, Dixie


  1. Hi Mom. Once a nurse, always a nurse! Make the damn patient get their own damn remote next time! Just kidding, you're just doing what you've always done, been a great provider. You have instilled that into all of us boys for sure. I see so many lazy ass parents out there, especially our generation. It just makes me shrug. I couldn't think of giving anything less than 100% to my family, and I know that comes from you!

  2. It's been a rough month, but now at least you know what you're dealing with and don't have to be in the dark. There are no more surprises, you know what you have to do. I know you will be strong and buckle down during the next couple of months of treatment and then surgery. You can beat this thing!

  3. Michael I am more proud of you boys than I can ever express.
    I love that you all are such good fathers and husbands-just all around good people. You all keep me strong! xoxoxo Mom