Tuesday, April 17, 2012

A Letter From Jan

This is a letter from my sister Jan, written to no one in particular but at the same time to everyone. I am printing it in it's entirety with her permission.

Never ask "Why Me"?
Yet, ask "Why not me"?
After all, I am no better than those before me.
Ask "Why"? for the little children.
Do you understand?
I don't!

I often marvel when people tell me how strong we are. (HA)!
If they only knew. We cry in silence just so you don't hear.
Yet, we know God's presence is near.

We are not alone .
Even though sometimes we feel lonely.
We are warriors fighting for a chance to live.
We are fighting a battle with an enemy we can't see.
Our army consists of our oncologist and God
so what more do we need?

We need you to love us and understand us.
If you look at us and have pity, that's alright.
Just do it with a smile.
After all we need a reason to smile.
Give a smile and you will receive one.

Please understand.
We are not contagious.
It's OK to hug us.

After I had my surgery a lady asked me why I didn't have reconstruction.
She said it seems as though I would feel less of a woman without breasts.
I looked her straight in the eye and told her there was more to me than boobs.

I felt more sorry for her than I did for myself. (Stupidity)!
We do what we have to for one more day on this Earth. Face it. We all want to go to Heaven but none of us want to set the alarm clock just yet.

Just like everyone else in this world, we want to stay here as long as possible.
We also realize that the hands on the clock seem a lot faster than they used to.

We are afraid of the Unknown and sometimes the Known.
We have been blessed so much with our spouses, children and grandchildren.
You probably think we are selfish. Well, in a sense I guess we are. We don't want to leave them.

Don't shy away from us. We need you to be kind and pray for us.
After all, a prayer can go a long way in our fight to survive.
I have learned to slow down and smell the roses and to not take anything for granted.
Not one of us is promised Tomorrow.
We just have to conquer fear and fight for our Tomorrow.

I hope this will help you to understand how we feel when we're diagnosed
with the Sleeping Beast commonly known as Cancer.
I will go to battle now for another great day.
God bless everyone.

Jan Miller

And to answer your question my beautiful sister-I love this letter!


  1. Wow that was a beautyfull letter . I love you both Dixie & Jan love Paulette

  2. And we love you too my dearest Paulette!